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Non-Sequiturs: 05.05.16

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* Ted Cruz never should have left the courtroom, it's the only place where his personality didn't get in his way. [Slate] * Meet Olympic hopeful Ashley Higginson. A track and field steeplechaser, she is a recent graduate of Rutgers Law School (which she got into after a personal plea to the dean) and has already passed the New York bar. Go Ashley! [Sports Illustrated] * I may have disagreed with him about Seattle's most infamous sports fan but Marc Randazza just secured a big win for TMZ getting wealthy Instagram porn-star tosser Dan Bilzerian's claim dismissed AND making Bilzerian cover TMZ's 22K legal bill. [The Dirty] * Good news! The Virgin Islands Supreme Court just found that calling a lawyer a liar is not defamatory. Conduct yourself accordingly. [Legal Profession Blog] * Ferguson prosecutor Stephanie Karr is being removed as city attorney after the DOJ's report on the city singled out her role in numerous constitutional violations. [St. Louis Post Dispatch] * A French worker sues his employer over boring work. Sounds like a fascinating caszzzzzzzzz... [Law and More]

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